One of the funniest men alive, wearing a shirt that say’s “I love NYC” in Arabic, delivers a stand-up comedy routine to the troops stationed in Iraq during a USO tour.
Note: It’s been brought to my attention that Robin Williams may not have said any of the following suggestions and that this blog article may be derived from a hoax email sent to me. However, some very pertinent points are made in this monologue, you decide whether it’s funny or not? or if Robin Williams said it?
BTW: Here’s a quote from an interview with Robin Williams by USA Today about his USO comic routines;
Williams said he’s “never been censored,” but the USO has asked him to tone down off-color jokes. He said his stage banter is “something from home that’s kind of wild, not your standard USO show.”
“I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I haven’t heard of plan for peace yet. So, here’s one plan for peace”
1) “The US will apologize to the world for our “interference” in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those “good ‘ole’ boys”, we will never “interfere” again.
2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea, the Middle East, and the Philippines. They don’t want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.
3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave.We’ll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They’re illegal!!! France will welcome them.
4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in If you don’t like it there, change it yourself and don’t hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don’t need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.
5) No foreign “students” over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don’t attend classes, they get a “D” and it’s back home baby.
6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while .
7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don’t like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)
8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not “interfere.” They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given
to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.
9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don’t need the spies and fair weather friends here Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.
10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us “Ugly Americans” any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH…learn it…or LEAVE..Now, isn’t that a winner of a plan?
“The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.” She’s got a baseball bat and she’s yelling, ‘you want a piece of me?’ ”
Disclaimer: The above was from a monologue, delivered as comic relief to troops stationed overseas, intended to make them (and you) both laugh and think, these statements are not necessarily the opinion of the editor.